Wait, What? There are 4 ways FEAR sparks you to focus on LOVE? Haven’t we always been taught as kids that fear is a bad thing? That we should avoid situations that make us feel fearful because it’s a sign of possible danger?
I would like to share with you a recent experience I had that helped me realize we can actually be grateful for fear. I know, I can hear you saying “Yeah right…here it comes.. the ‘fake it til you make it’ speech”. Fear not, my friends (Pun intended. LOL!). What I am sharing is about changing the perspective you have about fear, which means changing the thoughts you attach to Fear.
Please, Please, Anywhere But There!
I recently attended a team building event with several co-workers. I typically love team building events. I consider myself a people person and enjoy getting to know people beyond the work setting. I love the feelings of authentic team camaraderie; it’s a natural high for me. I was all excited until I heard the name of the location: “Hot Fired Arts”.
Yikes! I stink at art. It doesn’t come naturally to me (or at least that is what I thought beforehand). Instantly I felt Fear calling… self doubt thoughts started popping in my head like: “My project will look stupid, what will I even choose to do? How do I know what colors to use? Grrrr… why there? Any other place…”
My stomach started to feel queasy. I was instantly teleported back to elementary school in Mrs. Shriver’s art class, when I saw the amazing paintings of the other kids while my super basic sun in the corner and stick figures were from my perspective, terrible. Thankfully, I snapped out of my pity party, tapped into my optimistic nature, smiled, and said to myself “I guess I’ll just have to find a way to enjoy it”, but deep inside those pangs of fear were still there.
My Life Isn’t Threatened, What Is This?
Showtime! I’m in front of the shelf of what seemed to be hundreds of choices of items to paint. Those fear feelings are getting loud again; I can feel my temperature rise and my heart pounding, my hands even feel a little sweaty. I hear my internal voice say “Good grief, get a grip Jen…this is just painting, it supposed to be fun.”
I glance at my coworkers who all seem to know exactly what they want to do and already I’m feeling behind. Luckily I saw a ceramic piece that said “LOVE” and I thought, ok, that looks doable, how could I go wrong with Love?
And then it happened. I asked the instructor what colors to use. I eagerly awaited the expert to share her great wisdom (aka tell me the answer) and calm down my fear and anxiety. Her response was simple and profound: “Just listen to your Heart”.
For a moment I was stunned. That particular phrase has a very powerful meaning to me. I have been participating in a 6-month online course since 2016 called the Master Key Experience. First as a member, then as a Guide and eventually Guide-Staff member helping others along their unique life journey. And I hope I can help you along your journey a little bit by sharing the 4 ways fear sparks you to focus on love.
“Just listen to my heart”. Of course that’s it because all the answers are truly from within. In the midst of focusing on my perceived Fear, I temporarily took my focus off of the fundamental truth that we learn in the course from Charles Haanel’s book The MasterKey System:
“Harmony in the world within means the ability to control our thoughts, and to determine for ourselves how any experience is to affect us.”Charles Haanel, The Master Key System,
Hopefully what I learned from my art experience can help you avoid the pain that often seems to come with Fear. When Fear seems to creeps in, Focus all your thoughts on LOVE! The way to dispel darkness is to shine our light. The way to dispel Fear is to focus on LOVE.
Here are 4 ways Fear sparks you to focus on LOVE:
L = Listen to your Heart.
In the midst of a fearful thought or feeling, be still and be open to the messages that the Divine, your Source, or whatever you call Infinite Intelligence, is always working on our behalf and wants to help you create a life you choose and love.
O = Open your mind to associate new thoughts to a word.
I also learned about the 7 Laws of the Mind in the Master Key Experience. One of them is the Law of Substitution.
The Law of Substitution states “We cannot think about 2 things at the same time. If a negative thought enters your mind replace it with a pleasant thought.”Mark Januszewski
V = Visualize only what you want.
It takes practice and focused attention to keep our thoughts fixed on one thing, even if it’s a wonderful thing like Love. In his book the Master Key System, Charles Haanel provides a metaphor of a magnifying glass.
“The power of attention can be more readily understood by comparing it with a magnifying glass in which the rays of sunlight are focused; they possess no particular strength as long as the glass is moved about and the rays directed from one place to another; but let the glass be held perfectly still and let the rays be focused on one spot for any length of time, the effect will become immediately apparent”.Charles Haanel, The Master Key System
When I read this passage, I remember as a kid holding a magnifying glass steady on a sunny day over a piece a wood and poof, magically it started to burn part of the wood. If I moved it all around nothing happened. When we hold our mental magnifying glass steady on thoughts of LOVE only, that is all we see. Fear is no longer in focus, it diminishes, and with practice, it disappears altogether, by appreciating and applying the 4 ways fear sparks you to focus on love.
E = Expand your Comfort Zone.
We have all heard the saying if we want to grow we need to “Get out of your comfort zone”. At a primal level, our brain doesn’t want us to change, it is all about pure survival. Change alerts the brain to check for danger. If we have focused our thoughts to see all change as fearful and buy into society’s conditioning that no one likes to change, we are fueling fearful thoughts.
The great news is we can use Fear as a tool and focus on expanding our comfort zone baby step by baby step, not alerting the brain to go into a panic, like it often does when we attempt to “Get out of our Comfort zone”. For brief moments, Fight or Flight mode can be useful. For example, if there’s a close call when driving, immediately we have a surge of adrenaline, heightened concentration, and laser focus.
This Is Good!
These are rare occasions when you may not be served by reviewing the 4 ways fear sparks you to focus on love. In most cases, if you start to sense fear (like I did with my heart pounding as I was flustered trying to pick an item to paint) you can substitute the meaning that “this is good”. When I do that, I am more focused and can concentrate better. Give yourself grace and lots of practice to apply the “Law of Dual Thought” which states.
“Thought is a combination of ideation and feeling. We can attach any feeling to a thought we want.”Mark Januszewski
I am so grateful I opened my mind to associate a new meaning to the feelings of Fear I had that day painting with my co-workers. My initial fears were not accurate. I had a wonderful time chatting with my co-workers while we were painting. We ended up in a conversation about siblings and birth order related to personalities. All good! And by the way, my LOVE piece turned out great!! I absolutely love the colors and how it “pops” with happiness.
Added bonus, I learned 4 ways fear sparks you to focus on love and my experience confirmed for me what the Beatles sang in “All You Need is Love!”
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