December 1

15 comments

Is It Possible to Not Have an Opinion?

minutes remaining

Is it possible to not have an opinion? Is that even possible?  It certainly is a challenge for me!

Ever since I was introduced to this through the Master Key Experience (MKE), I have had a note card with red lettering on it spelling out – NO OPINION, taped to the border of my computer screen.  I needed, and still need, this reminder in my line of vision.

Not an easy exercise

When I learned to respond with a question rather than an answer (my opinion), my interactions took a very interesting, productive, and positive course.

I discovered people really want to feel important.  People really do want to be heard.

I see you

I love the greeting of the Zulu, Sawubona, meaning, “I see you.”

Sawubona: All my attention is with you.  I see you and I allow myself to discover your needs, to see your fears, to identify your mistakes and accept them.  I accept you for what you are and you are part of me.  

This is what we  want – to be seen, to be acknowledged.

So when I thought of this exercise of having no opinion, I convinced myself I was going to have to practice silence, which is not an easy task for yours truly!

I Had to Face It

Giving my opinion, even when asked, is purely egotistical.  Unless I am an expert on the subject, I have nothing to say.

Really, the only subject upon which I can speak with any expertise, and sometimes the jury is still out on that, is myself.  I am happy to share about my experiences.  More than that,  I am happy to have the opportunity to respond with a question I heard so often from my wonderful mentors.

Is it possible to not have an opinion? What Do You Think?

No, I do not need to take a vow of silence.  I engage by loving, giving, and encouraging.  Doing otherwise would be contrary to the Law of Compensation, an eye opening essay by Emerson.

All things are double, one against another… love for love.   Give and it shall be given you.  He that watereth shall be watered himself… If you put a chain around the neck of a slave, the other end fastens itself around your own.

Ralph Waldo Emerson

To me, the chain is my opinion and it asphyxiates me.

Even a fool is thought wise if he keeps silent, and discerning if he holds his tongue.

Proverbs 17:28

The Tongue . . . My Tongue

I read an article once where the author gave a great analogy, which he credited to the Book of James.

is it possible to not have an opinion

Think of the tongue as the rudder.  A rudder is the piece on a boat that gets lowered into the wwater to help steer a boat.  If the ‘captain’ of a boat wants to turn the boat, he merely turns the wheel of the boat which triggers a lever to move the rudder, which, in turn, turns the boat.

Imagine an aircraft carrier.  The captain moves his hand an inch to move the rudder a few feet, to change the destination of a the ship by hundreds of miles.

Words, like a rudder, are even more powerful.  If words are the rudder, then I am the captain.  My words amplify what is in my heart, my inner world.  Guarding my tongue, giving no opinion, reduces the amplification of my inner world.  My outer world is a reflection of my inner world.  Reduced amplification is a must.

My words (opinions) are in my control.  If I want to change the direction of my life, I need only to pivot in inch or so.  Being consistent in practicing the very small changes leads to gigantic changes down the road.

What goes around comes around.

I need to humbly love, listen, and learn.

To change my mind is to change my life.

SAWUBONA!

Read more articles by Louise Kohl

About the author

As a veteran homeschooling mother, Louise floundered after the children were gone. She wondered what had driven her before she was consumed with raising children. Her answer came when she enrolled in the Master Key Experience to begin her journey of self-discovery. Louise loves guiding individuals to discover their best selves while defining and clarifying their unique gifts. Her favorite part of guiding is watching individuals share their unique gifts, making an endless ripple effect of positive energy.

You may also like...

  • I loved your post on no opinions. I am still struggling with the thoughts of “when I do not share (my opinions) with others, especially if they ask, then I feel like I am withholding my honesty from them”. I am recognizing those times as they arise and am trying to turn the question back to them without it feeling like I am being evasive to them by not answering what they asked. Thank you for your helpful insights.

  • What a wisdom shared here, Louise! It is truly a constant and conscious alertness and practice of our mind that helps each of us to have this great mindset of “No Opinions”. I am also a sojourner who is working toward this tight captainship of my tongue that is constantly presenting the opportunity of taming it to perfection each day and thank you for sharing this beautiful greeting word “Sawubona”!

    • Blessings, Esther! The taming of the tongue is a daily exercise, even moment by moment for me sometimes. As these skills are practiced, it is amazing what transpires with those around us! I am so happy you find the Zulu word SAWUBONA a beautiful greeting. It really is!

  • Louise, your blog was on a topic that I could definitely identify with. I too am eager to give me opinion on something yet I’m gradually learning how important it is to listen more, talk less, and ask questions. I really liked you statement on how your words amplify what is in your heart, your inner world. Guarding your tongue, giving no opinion, reduces the amplification of your inner world. Your outer world is a reflection of your inner world. Reduced amplification is a must. Thanks for sharing your pearls of wisdom. How do you personally reduce your amplification?

  • I too, have found this practice very challenging and yet very rewarding! I loved when you said the small changes can lead to big changes later. Thanks for sharing!

  • Imagine if all the members of the world could look upon each other without judgment. I’m thankful that the MKE provides an atmosphere and the tools to do just that.

  • Thanks Ms Louise for this beautiful blog and it was read by Pammy so beautifully. Thanks for sharing it. I love that It is truly true that we can remove opinions from our vocabulary and our thought.

  • {"email":"Email address invalid","url":"Website address invalid","required":"Required field missing"}

    Stories Matter - Don't Miss Out!

    Get on the list for free updates. 

    Join our PRIVATE NEWSLETTER to learn things like "How to create more happiness with less stress" and other exciting stuff.  

    It's FREE. Do it now...

    >